Yes, Inspired by Justin Bieber Is it too late to say sorry ? How often do we realize that something did went wrong. I guess it would be too wrong to say never. A continuous pondering is there in our subconscious mind. Whereas there is a correlation of mind and dignity. A strong hold of mind keeps tampering our ego and decisions.Now, here obviously comes the game. Heart keeps pushing us to say sorry but mind bosses out all. Is it ego or shy behavior ask us to shut our mouth.
For the better understanding, I am categorizing people as apologetic and non apologetic person. It becomes quite evident that there are some psychological reasoning for the behavior of non apologetic.
- The very first reason can be the personality traits, which is supported by the false ego for sure. The ego harness the identity and here we are the joker of the dark knight.Taking an apology is the hardest word it seems.Some might takes it as a defensiveness or pride. I believe it is protecting the fragile sense of self.
- The statement” I m sorry” carries a heavy burden of psychological ramification. This burden is far deeper than the word itself. It portrays the fundamental fears (either consciously or unconsciously) which they desperately wish to avoid. It is quite a painful job for them to distinguish their actions from the character. An apology can be the biggest threat to the identity and their self esteem.
- For the person who often apologizes, it is a way to relieve the guilt of doing. But he opposite is with the non apologetic, it can be a door to shame and feel bad about them selves. It can also lead them to further accusations and conflicts. Which definitive they are welcoming to subside.
- Shame is more toxic than guilt. A guilt can be overcome with the period of time but shame stays forever. It can be one reason for not apologizing even if the mistake has been proven and understood by all.
- An interesting personality trait I personally observed in one of the web series: the protagonist enjoyed the state of anger, irritation and emotional distress. It can be one of the reason which holds back our non apologetic people.
A funny conclusion to non apology is to start apologizing. The happiness of acknowledgment is incomparable to the shame and tampered attitude. It is never too late to start afresh.
Would be happy to see people sharing their experience on saying sorry. Comments awaited.
I actually felt it will be lot easy to talk about the topic which is close to my heart but it turned out to be extremely difficult one to write those moments. OK for my part I want to share an experience today which broke me in pieces, shook me but again gave courage to struggle. It is a story of a girl and her parents who were forced to be a victim of dowry and her pregnant daughter was thrown out of the house because it was the female infanticide she was living with. We always talk about the amount of pain a girl has to bear when she is the real victim of the sorrow. But the bitter fact is the pain lies equally with the family of the girl. It’s tough to watch the dry eyes of the parents looking for a better life for her daughter. It is hard to raise a hurt little girl to an independent strong mother. It is even harsh when society tries to judge you. The reason told by the society is, you are a WOMAN, unfortunately. But the best part is, in all this chaos in her life, the girl had her family who stood right beside her, a family which is going to be there in all your goods and bad. We were so closely bonded that there wasn’t a micro space of particle. That bonding, love and affection made me strong and helped me raise my voice which is not shivering anymore. Those moments taught me how to handle a broken father, an old mother, a lost sister and raise your new born niece flowering with all the love of a mother. It also taught me that revenge is a waste of energy, all you need to have is good deeds and belief that everything will fall in place.
One thing I do want to mention here before concluding that I wants culprits to be behind bars but till then I can still cherish a new life among my family, I can cherish to be more stronger than I thought I could be .
A women represents a family, a society and an unbreakable idol. Our society still might be full of dirt and black hole but it’s our duty as a woman to behold our dignity and never back down.
To everyone, I expect you to cherish this special power we all have inside to be greater than what we think we are, before someone tries to break you. We all have it in us. When things falling apart, we see ourselves becoming stronger if we just never give up.